This Is Winning.

A very good friend wrote this about me and the changes I have made. It’s amazing to know that someone can see and appreciate the beauty of a life turned around when you feel like no one cares. Reminded me that when the people you care most about can’t see beyond who you’ve been there are people watching you literally become someone better. Thank you Virgil, for writing this, believing, and noticing.

Love. Martyrdom. Enlightenment. All one in the same, requiring the giving of one’s life as pension for a cause that people only experience betwixt the borders of brilliance and insanity. That place, nothing but a capital of many hearts given, was where I saw him. A man, seeking to become something beyond himself.

Perplexed by foresight, he was his own worst enemy. Hope drove him, a consistent stubbornness, whose buoyancy was keeping his head above water, but not above reproach.

No unearthly amount of earthly metamorphosis could compel a man to become what he became. Or who he became, rather. The spitting image of his own Father. He could barely recognize the works of his hands, as he toiled to be less like himself and more like someone else, erasing his trailing footprints branded in the snow, hailing from the cold, dark past of a most recent martyr. He would look into the open sky, adorned with the accents of brilliant, bright speckles of insignificant light, and admonish his Creator with a hopeful and loving fear.

I could only gaze, understanding that the change undergone was the work of no man, but rather the work of love. And he knew. He knew that love had unmistakably changed him. Could a man ever obtain such a love for himself without it being given him from above? I have believed in such things for most of my life. Believed for a terrestrial euphoria, fashioned to fit my perfect likeness. A plight that causes me to vanquish the vagrant. Rout the rogue. Dredge the drifter. Nullify the nomad. Withdraw the wanderer. I allude to the embetterment of young love, initially resembling the prosperous image of golden infatuation. But to gain a heart worth fighting for…nothing comes even close to the experience. That man!…the one standing there, has caused something to surface within me.

Through his influence, I’ve had much exposure to my past self; I stare into the very same firmament as he, dreaming the same dreams, reaching for the same dazzling light. “Show me your friends, and I’ll show you your future”, a man once said. I turn to the skyline, my eyesight piercing through the dark shades of blue shrouding the night sky, and realize that–with this man–my future supersedes the boundless expectations of any dreamer. That the probability of living a normal life is merely chaff in the wildest storm. On the horizon flares the sign of a new season, a glimmer hope. I see it…I hear it…saying sail. Sail…and don’t look back.”



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